by Christel | Dec 31, 2021 | Podcast
How can you actively take part in creating the future you desire?
This episode highlights the practice of future casting, which is an active collaboration with spoken word, breath, sound, and energy healing.
I’m Christel Arcucci. You’re listening to the Soul Purpose Podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people pleasing, create healthy boundaries, reclaim power, and live your soul purpose legacy.
How is this different from the law of attraction teachings? (LOA) While I agree that our energy and attention create momentum.
If you’re stuck in the looping patterns of your mind, it’s difficult to move into a different energy frequency.
With future casting, you are actively participating and feeling your body and breathing your breath and speaking your dreams out loud. It becomes infinitely easier to get out of the habitual tracks that have set in your mind and in your emotional body and in your physical body.
Thank you for being here, it’s a pleasure to walk the soul purpose path with you.
You’re listening to the soul purpose podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people pleasing, create healthy boundaries, reclaim power, and live your soul purpose legacy.
You can access the Free Soul Success Journal & meditation and all episodes of the podcast and all the goodies mentioned in this episode at soulpurposepodcast.com/11
If you are interested in exploring soul purpose mentorship options with me visit soulpurposepath.com to fill out an application.
I believe in you and the magic power of your soul.
For more revolutionary teachings and tools, please follow on your favorite podcast app or visit soulpurposepodcast.com. I look forward to connecting with you in the next episode.
I am sending you so much love!
by Christel | Dec 19, 2021 | Podcast
The Practice of Embodied Soul Purpose is the ability to distinguish between intuition guiding your choices or anxiety running your life.
I’m Christel Arcucci, you’re listening to the Soul Purpose Podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people pleasing, create healthy boundaries, reclaim power, and live your soul purpose legacy.
I based this podcast upon the assumption that every adult has experienced trauma int their life. Trauma can include events that are obviously difficult, like a car accident, illness or injury, a pet dying, having surgery, giving birth, death of a loved one, divorce, buying a house, losing a job, being bullied or getting robbed. The struggles of your own or a loved ones addiction, or a history of abuse or abandonment.
Trauma also includes events that FELT traumatic and may have been dismissed as “no big deal.” Like being left with a baby sitter, not getting a part in the 1st grade play, or being told you can’t sing. On the surface these events can be easily overlooked yet they may leave traumatic imprints.
The level of trauma in the body, mind, and heart all depends on how you learn to regulate your nervous system during and after a traumatic event.
I believe everyone has trauma to unwind and integrate.
A key component of embodied trauma integration practice is learning to distinguish between your intuitive body wisdom guiding your choices and your pain body wounding running your life.
Keep in mind your pain body wounding is not bad or wrong, you are not broken for struggling with anxiety or depression, the hardest life lessons are often the greatest teachers. The key teaching of this podcast is to recognize when the pain body is hijacking your brain is trying to convince you that it is in charge and the CEO of your life.
Let’s start to distinguish choices from your intuitive body that are low importance and how your wounding, survival strategy or the mind’s override mechanism will try to derail and control you.
The reason this happens is because your mind is literally designed to keep you in safety, which means keep you in what is familiar, even if it’s unhealthy.
As Carl Jung said, “until you make your unconscious, conscious it will rule your life and you will call it fate.”
Your task, should you choose to accept the challenge is to face your shadows and learn the inner landscape of programming vs transformational change.`
First practice is getting dressed in the morning or planning your outfits at night. Take a moment and a deep soul body breath to ground and connect your mind, body, and heart. Feel your feet on the floor, take a deep breath, gently move your body and bounce to bring your awareness from mind down into your heart, down into your hips.
Listen to episode 5 for more information the soul body breath practice.
Stand in front of your closet and ask, “what is the best color or outfit to wear tomorrow in order to step into my greatest soul-centered power?” Or change the request to speak directly to your desired experience or outcome. “In order to generate more money.” “In order to enjoy delightful collaboration with my clients or partners” name the specific outcome or experience you want to have that day.
Keep breathing and notice what your mind says and notice what your body guides you to.
Often you will have an exciting first inspiration yet your mind may try to logic you out of taking action since your brain is wired to keep you safe by keeping your life and choices familiar even if it’s unhealthy and or you are unhappy.
When your mind is disconnected from your heart and intuitive body wisdom your wounded parts will try to lead, this is not meant to demonize your mind. When your mind is disconnected from the heart and body wisdom, it can tell you all manner of stories that are not true, supportive or rooted in intuitive body wisdom or intuition. So at first when you start this practice the mind is going to try and take control, “listen to me, I’m the boss.”
Making healing choices from a deeply rooted connection takes time and practice. Be an observer when you’re standing in front of your closet and ask who is leading?
Love or fear?
Intuition or anxiety?
Intuitive body wisdom or pain body wounding?
Getting dressed in the morning there is no great risk, nothing is at stake if you follow general protocol yet still allow yourself to play.
After you ask the question and then listen, listen, listen.
Open your mind to how you receive the guidance, some people will hear words, some will want to scan your clothes with your eyes or hands until you feel it, others will have a deep knowing.
Here’s an example:
My mind says: wear the teal colored dress.
My intuitive body says: wear the the coral skirt, and purple top.
Take a breath. Pause. Listen to voices and explore the feeling signature of each voice and its essence in the moment.
Is it love or fear?
Is it intuition or anxiety?
When you start this practice you may experience discomfort in listening to your intuitive animal body wisdom.
As I selected this random example just imaging standing in front of my closet my mind said, “Wait, those are really bold colors together, do they even go together? What’s going on?” Even this is a made up example my mind is overriding the intuitive guidance yet I have done enough practice to know the difference between wounding and wisdom.
As I build trust in my intuition, I’m going to trust myself and make this choice to wear this outfit and go on with my day.
Eating is another great place to experiment with this practice. When you sit down to eat or choosing what you’re going to have for a meal. Ask your intuitive body from a place of deep connection.
Become anchored in your place of connection by taking deep breaths, feeling your body, recognize where you are in time and space, then ask, “What can I eat for lunch, that will support the highest expression of my body, mind and soul right today? Or to boost my immune system or help me feel clear and awake?”
If you’re choosing from a menu or choosing from your refrigerator, pay attention to what your mind says and what your intuitive body says.
These two practices are a great place to start, as you become aware of what you wear and what you eat and notice how often your Intuitive body and the override mechanism of your mind pull you into different directions.
The next stage of unwinding, healing and learning is to distinguish between wounding and wisdom would be in attending certain events, going to a party, an event or meeting someone new.
If you are in a phase of deep trauma where there’s a fear of going out, there can be healthy fear that comes from wisdom, and then there’s wounded fear that comes from trauma, the pain body and wounding.
Fear is not bad so be careful not to automatically connect feeling afraid with wounding. It’s important in your healing that you learn what emotions, feelings and sensations are rooted in truth vs where you can stretch yourself to expand your comfort zone.
Make it your practice to discover where and when to challenge yourself in a way that is rooted in wisdom and not in wounding because the wounded fear will push you to do things when the cost is too great.
I have unknowingly pushed myself too far many times when attending workshops, trainings or business events when I’ve said, “you have to go, you’re gonna miss out, you need this information, if you don’t get this information your business will fail.”
Okay, that was a really good example of wounded fear driving. You can feel and hear the FOMO and threats present in that example of self talk.
When I was working on this in my own practice many years ago I was attending a lot of business events. Most of those events were in hotel conference rooms with recycled air, fluorescent lights with no windows, tight seating back in the day. When we used to do that with 50 to 500 people, the is not my ideal environment, it’s hard on me.
I was actively working on this intuitive body healing practice to restore my intuition I would negotiate with myself, and use my inner guidance to help me select the best choice for the outcome I desired.
For example if there is a two day business building event I am considering attending, I connect my breath with my body-mind, to decide if I was even going to the event by asking, “will this event support me and my business to create a bigger impact and make more money?”
If the answer is yes, then I would choose which sessions to attend based on my intuitive body wisdom. There were generally morning and afternoon sessions sometimes evening sessions with lunch and dinner break.
Examples of how I plan my day, I would attend the morning session and then leave after lunch, or I would show up at the end of the lunch break and attend the afternoon session.
Sometimes I would be guided to walk out in the middle of a session, sit on the sun, or walk around the block, and then come back for the next session. I let my intuition guide me and it became easy to distinguish when wounding or fear was trying to control me.
Yes, I was missing information yet as I rebuilt trust with my intuition I always ended up hearing the information I most needed or magically meeting someone to collaborate with on a project I was working on.
The FOMO fear/wounding voice would jump in and declare, “if you don’t attend EVERYTHING your business is going to fail.”
My bone deep intuitive animal body says, “that is not accurate information. You are speaking from fear and wounding, no thank you.”
The intuition and wisdom body is not rooted in fear, it’s not an urgent, emergency type of feeling when you receive guidance.
When my intuition is guiding me and it is actually an emergency it feels grounded, rooted, clear, firm, direct, kind yet confident.
The fear and wounding voice uses, threats, shame, FOMO and false urgency.
As you practice you will begin to recognize the fear program and rebuild trust instead.
I want to restate this teaching in another way to make sure it lands since this is often life changing for my clients once they get it in their bones.
If we go back to the business events example. Pause, breathe, feel your feet on the floor and anchor yourself in the present time and say, “honey. I love you, and I’ll be at the sessions that I need to be at.” I trust that what I need it’s available and will be provided when I need it.”
When you’re in a place of deep connection body, mind, heart and soul you’re rooted in your being, what you need, shows up.
The soul body breath practice is helping you weave your body, mind and heart together. In order to notice when and how your trauma and wounding pulls you off center.
Soul body, breath and present moment awareness helps anchor you in trust, connection, willingness to face hardships, shadow aspects, wounds and being okay with the things that you miss out on.
This practice will help you to choose what you attend or what you do. Each time you consciously select the places that you stretch and challenge yourself for positive and empowered choice you are healing your entire animal body intuitive system
Stretch yourself in ways that it’s easier to heal, think about increasing trust in your intuitive body like increasing your physical capacity. If you are learning to do the splits and can’t even go halfway down, it would be unwise to overriding my body’s limits and wisdom forcing yourself into the splits on the first day.
If you have perfectionist tendencies keep in mind and heart that you will not do this perfectly and forcing yourself with an override approach would likely get you injured, but take your time with patience, sensitivity and persistence every day you will increase your capacity and restore your intuitive animal body wisdom.
Journal prompts (visit Soulpurposepodcast.com for a printable version)
I encourage you to write without stopping and without editing. The answers are your perspective and experience, there’s no right or wrong, yet the practice itself often highlights your personal relationship with wounding and wisdom, intuition and anxiety,
What’s the difference between wounding and wisdom?
Write a magical example of your intuitive body?
How does your pain body trick you into thinking it’s the CEO?
How can you tell the difference?
Wounding:
Contraction/hardening/urgency/frenetic energy/demanding/bossy/shaming/making wrong/either or thinking/controlling
Wisdom:
Solid/confident/grounded/quiet/clear/knowing/certain/grounded/kind/focused/unconditionally loving/having choice
Wisdom is knowing how far to go.
Wounding is shaming yourself for making a mistake.
Just like if you have a yoga practice that wisdom of knowing how far to go in a pose.
Wisdom is trusting yourself and to challenge yourself when not to challenge yourself, so that you’re anchoring our choices from a place of wisdom, and not from wounding because when your make choices and push ourselves and challenges ourselves from a place of wounding, it can traumatize yourself or create new trauma.
My invitation to you is to take on one or more of these practices. Practice in your everyday life with small things that are low risk, where there’s no great cost in learning, to distinguish between intuition and wounding or love and anxiety.
The focus of this podcast today is to anchor yourself in your being and whatever ways you do that. Connect body, mind, heart, and soul. Come into the present moment and learn to distinguish when your intuition is guiding you. When your wisdom is guiding you, or when your wounding, pain body or anxiety is trying to push you forward and control you.
Thank you for being here, it’s a pleasure to walk the soul purpose path with you.
You’re listening to the soul purpose podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people pleasing, create healthy boundaries, reclaim power, and live your soul purpose legacy.
You can access the Free Soul Success Journal & meditation and all episodes of the podcast and all the goodies mentioned in this episode at soulpurposepodcast.com/10
I believe in you and the magic power of your soul.
For more revolutionary teachings and tools please follow on your favorite podcast app or visit soulpurposepodcast.com. I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode.
I am sending you so much love!
by Christel | Sep 10, 2021 | Podcast
How many times have you been told to play nice? This real talk episode is focused on giving you permission to access your creative power, to play naughty and explore the question: what do I *REALLY* want to create?
I’m Christel Arcucci, you’re listening to the Soul Purpose Podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people pleasing, create clear boundaries, reclaim power, and live your soul purpose legacy.
This podcast is informational and this episode is a very special embodied journey of sensual hypnosis with energetic healing, I intend to seduce you with my voice.
Yes, seduce you into a greater, deeper, more delicious experience of your body and your soul purpose. I will use sounding, deep breaths to help you feel and integrate the teachings into your body and mind.
When I was a little girl, I dreamt of being an artist and writer.
The dominant culture says that artists struggle and aren’t good with money.
I became a healing artist instead, so I could focus on building a service and education business with jewelry design as a “artistic passion project”.
I am blessed to make a living doing work aligned with soul purpose. I always wondered if I could make more room for the artist and writer in my business…
A wild idea during the heart of the global reset in 2020 bloomed into a secret business, and the first month I made $560 from my art.
I have launched hundreds of business ideas, some have been successful and some have failed. I’ll share my take on failure in an upcoming podcast episode. The “failed” biz ideas have cost me tens of thousands of dollars over the years and I will never stop believing in and trying inspired ideas.
I have publicly proclaimed I would publish several books and delayed the latest book publication date (with my real name) due to fire evacuation and an unexpected move.
One year ago today I took a crazy chance… I selected a pen name and let myself PLAY and try something wild, new, unexpected, creative and naughty.
My wild creative artist dreamer generated $26,000 in the first year in this “side business.” I know there’s lots of talk about how peeps have made “6 figures in my first 6 minutes in business,” ok I am exaggerating a little. I am delighted with this success!
There is so much power in not hiding who you are, yet I have found incredible freedom in not giving a f-ck about what anyone thinks and letting myself play, dream, create and explore.
It’s a *REALLY* stressful time in the world, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, afraid, confused, depressed, anxious, etc.
I invite you to take a crazy chance on your dream and do the f-cking creative-wild-artistic-and scary-thing. You can start small and in secret at first if that suits you.
A client messaged me today to let me know she received a $500 tip on top of her fee for a commissioned mural.
YES MORE PLEASE!
Sensual hypnosis to Awaken your Creative Power:
I invite you to make yourself very comfortable, allow your body to set up and whatever you’re sitting on. If you can lay down, that would be even better. Let your body settle and let your mind stay focused on my voice. Trusting my voice to guide you. Hmm. Yes. Guiding you feel your breath is moving without any effort.
Your breath is moving in and out without you even having to think about it. Breath, rising and falling breath, arising and falling. Your breath helping you feel more relaxed, more settled and more open.
I invite you to open your mouth and take a deep inhale in and exhale. Let it out with a sound or a sight or a naughty moan.
Going deeper.
And deeper into a creative and relaxed state.
Creative power lives inside of you. It is the power that is breathing your breath without any effort. No effort, just relaxation.
You find yourself standing at the top of the steps, walking down a 7 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, and 1.
Feeling so relax, standing in front of the crystal elevator, the doors slide open. Mm. Yes. And you step inside glittering gemstone buttons and you already know intuitively which one to select.
And the doors are closed, sliding down, down, down. Going deeply into your creative power.
Moving past any layers of resistance, not entertaining any thoughts and letting them float away, like little butterfly, no need to hold on or catch them. There’s so much more beautiful and they’re fluttering way. Brightly colored wings leaving streaks in the sky.
So relaxed, so open trusting yourself and this journey.
Listen to the podcast for the full journey.
Thank you for being here, it’s a pleasure to walk the soul purpose path with you.
You’re listening to the soul purpose podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people pleasing, create clear boundaries, reclaim power, and live your soul purpose legacy.
You can access the Free Soul Success Journal & meditation and all episodes of the podcast and all the goodies mentioned in this episode at soulpurposepodcast.com/9
If you are interested in exploring soul purpose mentorship options with me visit soulpurposepath.com to fill out an application.
I believe in you and the magic power of your soul.
For more revolutionary teachings and tools please follow on your favorite podcast app or visit soulpurposepodcast.com. I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode.
I am sending you so much love!
by Christel | Aug 29, 2021 | Podcast
Let’s play in the deep end with a shadow integration practice called: Love the Heart of Fear. What does the heart of fear mean? Is it possible to love fear?
I’m Christel Arcucci, you’re listening to the Soul Purpose Podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people pleasing, create healthy boundaries, reclaim power, and live your soul purpose legacy.
You may have noticed that episode 8 is weeks late. This episode is going to start with the real life challenges I am facing instead of the past episodes that focused on core elements of what I teach my clients.
The plan for episode 8 was, “Wounding or Wisdom – How to Heal your Intuitive Body.”
On a Tuesday a few weeks ago a FB live I created 4 years ago popped up in my FB memories “Loving the Heart of Fear.”
I watched it, impressed this lady named Christel Arcucci dropped some wisdom bombs about shadow work and transformation. 😉 I had the audio transcribed as inspiration for a future episode of the podcast.
Wednesday (the next day) a wildfire starts dangerously close to my home in Northern California. As soon as I hear about the fire, I checked to find out how close is it to my home and drive home, hoping I will still be able to collect my valuables and evacuate. I know the roads may already be closed…I’m driving towards a wildfire. The fire clouds and smoke are ENORMOUS AND TERRIFYING.
2016 the wildfires in California started impacting my friends, places I love and communities *VERY* near me. In late summer of 2020 after 4 years of this intense stress combined with dangerous air quality and the pandemic felt like hell. I swore to myself I wouldn’t and couldn’t stay through another fire season in California.
When I arrive home on I was already in fight or flight stress response. I’m grateful I made it home before the roads closed or the fire reached my home yet feeling overwhelmed about what to take, where to go or what to do next.
The FB video on Tuesday had given me a transmission of love for the fear that is now coursing through my heart and flooding my system with stress hormones. Reminder to pay attention to all the signs and resources you are offered to you even if they don’t make sense in the moment.
Now you see why this episode is focused on loving the heart of your fear and why I am weeks late in delivering this. In the last 5 weeks there have been 3 wildfires that threatened my home.
As you know I get off on befriending my shadows, loving my shame, loving my fear, and getting in there and being with those parts that I wish didn’t exist. It would be easier if life was just unicorns, rainbows and wildflowers right?
Earth School is the shadow integration masters program that you may have realized you signed up for yet cannot escape…. So let’s make this wild ride more enjoyable.
All kinds of protection mechanisms and survival strategies keep you from looking at your fears, help you avoid feeling pain sadness, grief, shame even desire or sexual arousal.
Your brain is wired to survive. To try to keep you away from what you fear in order to keep you safe in what is known and familiar.
Your journey of awakening who you are and your purpose is rooted in being able to embrace your full human experience and your ability to accept and even love yourself.
You can say all day, “I love myself I love myself I love myself I love myself.”
And there’s a part of your brain saying, “Yeah, but what about the horrible thing you did. What about that like horrible thing you said? What about swearing at the person that didn’t use their turn signal? Or what about when you were five? You are bad and wrong so you can’t LOVE THAT!”
It’s easy to love the pretty parts of yourself, easier anyway.
It’s harder to love the undesirable things about yourself, to love the bad things that you’ve said and done.
Dominant culture decides what is good or bad, right or wrong, acceptable or forbidden.
I’m exploring embracing my shadow, befriending the skeletons in my closet, rather than trying to pretend they’re not there, I invite them for tea.
It takes an enormous amount of courage to acknowledge and accept your shadow, let’s be real.
Shadow integration isn’t a casual thing you take up one day and it’s all grand and rosy with your skeletons carefully coming down out of the closet and sit at the table with you, they will likely throw shit and will likely be really mean at first.
So… is loving the heart of fear possible and why am I talking about it?
It’s an important part of your journey of healing and a central way to love those horrible parts of yourself.
This shadow integration practice doesn’t condone bad behavior or abuse from yourself or anyone else, but it is about loving the wounded parts of yourself and the collective. When you can do this inside yourself you’ll be better able to engage with the shadow aspects of others.
The heart is the softest most vulnerable, innocent and tender core element of everyone. When you turn into that truth it’s easier to imagine the possibility of loving the heart of anything that you most want to avoid or fear.
Start this practice by being willing to admit and be with your fear, doubt, shame, sadness, grief, addiction, victim, perpetrator, rescues etc.
All the parts of yourself that you wish didn’t exist and also the behaviors and traits which trigger you in others.
Acknowledge the shadows exists and be with them. “I see you”
Invite them into your journaling practice, meditation or mindful movement practice rather than pushing them away. “I feel you.”
The next level is to love your shadows.
Love the heart of your fear.
Love the heart of your deepest, darkest, scariest parts…the ones that you if could, you would throw them out of the universe. “I love you.”
I’ve discovered the heart of fear is where so much power lives. I will even go so far as to say unlimited power lives.
Tap into that power to be more aligned, on purpose and connected to who you are and what you’re really here to do.
The more that you run from fear, the more you run from being yourself. Is that’s a game you want to play?
Playing hide and seek with the infinite power of your soul is why you decided to become human, it’s so fun!
This is demonstrated in the 5 Acts (or Powers) of Shiva. The ability to create, maintain, destroy, conceal and reveal.
The game of playing hide and seek with each other and yourself is a fun game when you’re young… do you still the divine play now? Especially with the intensity of what’s happening in 2021 for example?
Although the way that adults most often play hide and seek is unconscious and full of shadow material most often we don’t even realize what and who you are hiding from.
Lila is a Sanskrit word that means Divine Play and is a powerful tool to help remind you of the conscious game of hide and seek that you decided to become human and “forget” that you are infinite intelligence.
Using your life force energy to hide who you really are and what you think is exhausting and painful, and can lead to illness, depression, anxiety and suppressed immune function.
I invite you today, at whatever level you’re ready is to turn towards your fear.
Name fear.
Be with fear.
Befriend fear.
Love the heart of fear.
Look fear in the eye and really be with what is there. Be willing to stay in the intensity and see what opens for you.
Im my practice of loving the heart of fear I like to practice this while eye gazing in the mirror. After a few breaths to drop in, it doesn’t take long before there’s a massive shift. As I’m able to feel the resistance to fear, the fear softens and opens. The resistance to feeling fear which is most often a desire to control in order to feel safe.
Resistance, the desire to push away or get away from takes so much energy.
With the practice of simply being with fear, being with doubts, demons, shadows or skeletons unlocks so many resources and power.
Loving the heart of what you what to avoid or destroy changes everything and changes it quickly.
Where are you in your journey of loving your fear, shadow and what you wish didn’t exist within you, others or the collective?
Be willing to be with your fear, love the heart of that what scares you most.
Love the heart of the most horrible things you’ve done in your life, love the horrible thoughts and you learn to love life itself, all of it.
I still often want life to be easy, playful, abundant and full of all my favorite things and the reality is that life on earth is the expression of spectrum of all possibilities and experiences.
My practice is anchoring myself in the moment with breath, mindfulness, and movement practices and then remember the divine play of life on earth, that humanity is actively co-creating this experience.
Love your shadow, it liberates you from struggling again what is and trying to control the uncontrollable.
Your shadows will act out when you try to get rid of them or repress them… the shadow will create trouble.
Love your shadows, shame, anger, rage, sadness as much as you can.
Be willing to turn towards, look in the eyes of the parts of yourself that you wish weren’t there, and love all parts of yourself. When you’re able to do that, then things will change in the outer world.
It’s so easy to run from the hard and ugly stuff. Oh, just keep yourself busy and do to anything to avoid looking at or being with fear.
Turn towards fear.
Be with anger.
Embrace sadness.
Sit with rage.
Love the heart of fear.
To the healing that is possible and the transformation that is available… love your heart, and love what you fear most.
Thank you for being here, it’s a pleasure to walk the soul purpose path with you.
You’re listening to the soul purpose podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people-pleasing reclaim power and create your soul purpose legacy.
You can access the Free Soul Success Journal & meditation and all episodes of the podcast and all the goodies mentioned in this episode at soulpurposepodcast.com/8
I believe in you and the magic power of your soul.
For more revolutionary teachings and tools please follow on your favorite podcast app or visit soulpurposepodcast.com. I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode.
I am sending you so much love!
by Christel | Aug 1, 2021 | Podcast
Are you creating connection or separation in your life and relationships? How can you choose to respond instead of be hijacked by a stress response or trauma pattern?
I’m Christel Arcucci, you’re listening to the Soul Purpose Podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people pleasing, reclaim power, and create your soul purpose legacy.
I am recording this episode in July 2021 it’s an incredibly intense time in human history with so many people experiencing extreme stress and daily challenges.
Two of the greatest concerns is the lack of recognition and support for a population that is working with dysregulated nervous system and the lack of ability to have meaningful discourse on charged topics. I believe the lack of ability to navigate conflicts is because of the first issue that and most people don’t know what this means to have a dysregulated nervous system and how to resolve it.
This amplifies the ‘power over’ dysfunction and limits the chances of coming into ‘power with’ a framework, I have talked about power over vs power with in almost every episode so far.
The basic idea of power with is we’re in this together. And how can we come to a solution rather than I’m going to try to overpower you or bully you into doing what I want.
So…. how can we as a collective come into balance even in a stressed state to be able to respond instead of react?
Today’s topic applies to every relationship in your life no matter what is happening in the world yet with the intensity of what is happening in the world it’s even more important to learn to self-regulate, navigate conflict skillfully and work together to create win-win solutions.
In the present time these topic are important and essential to humanities survival and not easy to implement.
Are you consciously choosing to create connection or separation? Including on social media
There are times that creating separation also called clear and healthy boundaries is the best choice if you’re in an unsafe place or unhealthy relationship.
The main focus of this episode is to be able to CHOOSE TO RESPOND instead of react from a stress response or trauma pattern.
The results of dysfunctional and harmful communication that is rooted in:
us against them
right or wrong
truth or lies
black or white
With us or against us
Either or thinking instead of ‘both and.’
Can you move into a state of ‘yes and’?
Notice, what happens in your nervous system the I ask that question?
There may be some topics that feel so charged for you that you can’t even, won’t even consider it.
And I ask you to take gentle breaths and be willing to explore this topic more deeply.
This is fueling the divide and remember that “divide and conquer” is a strategy of war that works… so who are you really fighting against?
Let’s work on the concept to agree to disagree, for some this idea is so threatening right now yet I believe not being willing or able to self-regulate is rooted in trauma and not the present moment circumstances.
You can have strong thoughts, options and beliefs about your position AND have a reasonable discussion about differences when you have two or more regulated nervous systems to engage.
Either or thinking is often the result of deeply held conditioning and or trauma.
I think humanity as a species is in a collective crisis and trauma response and my focus with this episode is to create connection, curiosity and “yes and” opportunities through our differences. I spoke how to utilize the improv practice of “yes and” as a shadow integration tool in ep 3 The Shadow side of Gratitude Practice.
I am not going to talk about specifics or my perspective or position on any of the HOT TOPICS because the focus is on creating connection even with different opinions, stress management, shadow work, integrating trauma and the power to choose by working with a ‘power with’ framework.
Are you creating connection or are you creating separation?
Humanity is at a tipping point and the question is will humanity come together and make it through this or fight, disagree and expedite the collapse of human civilization?… again.
Let’s talk about a powerful shadow work practice before going further…..Can you go to the mirror right now look into your own eyes and say, “I am a ________” fill in the blank of the topic you are most adamantly opposed to right now. Can you say I have the capacity to be and do that which I most want to avoid or hate most about humans?
I AM THAT.
BOOM. If you can do that and maintain a neutral nervous system you stop playing this show right now. If not keep listening and you’ll get closer to integrating the hardest and ugliest aspects of free will.
Free will gives us the choice and ability to do the most amazing and horrible things.
Let’s try an example. I talk about VPR victim-perpetrator-rescuer on the show.
Can you look into your own eyes in the mirror and say, “I am a perpetrator.” Or “I am a victim.” Or “I am a rescuer.”
Which one is the hardest for you to say. Which one is the easiest for you? Which one lands in the middle?
For me, the easiest one to say, and for most people will be, I am the rescuer.
And the hardest one for me to say is not, I am a perpetrator. The hardest one for me to say is I am a victim. There’s the most internal charge and resistance for, for me personally, since I don’t want to admit that I don’t want to be that. So, how does that land for you?
Of those examples its hardest for me to say, “I am a victim.” There is the most internal charge and resistance for me since I don’t want to admit that.
You may feel a lot of intense emotions with this practice you will be able to say it from a neutral perspective and little to no emotional charge.
Why is that?
Because that helps you to see that you can be any of those. Yet you are in a place of a regulated, nervous system, which allows you to choose to be the victim, the perpetrator, or the rescuer or not to be that is the whole point.
I also encourage you to do this practice with the hot topics you are feeling about the state of humanity today.
Shadow work is the ability to integrate and embrace ALL aspects of your shadow and light. The incredible and horrible. Free will gives you the creative power and opportunity to be a serial killer or a saint and anything and everything in between being able to regulate your nervous system is what gives you the power to choose who you want to be, how you want to show up and how you want to utilize the tools of connection and separation.
Good people generally don’t like considering the shadow aspects of what is possible to do as a human yet being willing to embrace this reality and work together in personal and collective shadow and trauma integration is a core part of healing humanity.
It’s ideal that you work with basic tools of understanding how to communicate when your nervous system is regulated and how to recognize your own nervous system being dysregulated or noticing it in somebody when you’re trying to communicate with. Practice coming back into a state of co-regulation, which simply means that you and the other person that you’re communicating with are in a state of rest and digest and not fight or flight.
If you are in a fight or flight stress response those are the only choices your brain registers in order to stay safe and survive and not about connection.
Fight or flight only cares about your survival and not about connection.
If you are in a fight stress response you will make the other person wrong, attack, defend name call etc
Your autonomic nervous system (ANS) controls the subconscious operation of your nervous system with two primary branches.
Sympathetic nervous system controls the fight or flight response
Parasympathetic nervous system controls your ability to rest and digest.
In the modern world most of the time the fight or flight response is set off in situations that are not life or death. You practice in the moment when you feel extreme stress is to ask yourself is this a life or death situation?
When the answer is no, take a beat, take a breath and anchor yourself in the present moment. Listen to Ep 5: Create the Future with a One Breath Meditation for more support with this.
Bring your system back into a rest and digest state where you can have a conversation with whoever you’re in the disagreement with
Step One: Self Regulate
1. Take a gentle breath
2. Notice sensations you are experiencing to connect with your physical body
3. Anchor your attention in present time to make sure that you are only dealing with the stress of the moment
4. Listening to your thoughts to notice how your system wants to react instead of respond
5. Breathe and stay in the present moment.
Step Two: Recognize the DAMN BS
1. Defend
2. Attack
3. Make wrong
4. Name call
5. Blame
6. Shame
All of these fight responses create more stress, separation and disconnection.
So then you go back to step one, anchoring yourself in your body. Breathing deeply notice sensations, even communicate with the person you’re talking to. I’m noticing I’m feeling stressed right now. I need to take a moment.
Step Three: Choose to respond
1. Be curious about what is possible
2. Dedicate yourself to creating connection instead of separation.
3. Agree to disagree
4. Take a breath regulate your stress system so then you can choose to respond can you learn to agree to disagree on any topic to be Curious
Be committed to looking for that place that you connect.
Be willing to look for your shared humanity.
go beyond separation to find the connection of our humanity
On a fundamental level I believe all people to have a good life for themselves and those around them.
Yet this is an epic time in history of extreme separation and destruction learn to self-regulate and then co-regulate with others and reclaim the ability to have meaningful discourse about topics we disagree about.
Ultimately I think all want to thrive, that desire may be expressed in different ways but essential seeking love and connection, shelter, food and purpose.
Are you willing to look beyond the external expressions?
they worship this God and don’t believe in god.
they want this thing to happen and I want something else to happen
they want this person to be elected and I want that person to be elected
They believe in this cause and I don’t
Can you tap into shared Humanity of living on the same planet and completely dependent upon the health of this Planet to survive?
Then move into a state of creating greater love and connection and having conversations about the things that we disagree about instead of attacking, defending, name calling… etc
Are you able to move out of stress response, be curious, compassionate and have conversations that have the potential of creating change?
This is not easy yet this is the most important practice to resolve conflicts, integrate trauma patterns, and create love and connection.
I am opposed to fueling the fire of division and separation, I believe we’re in this together. Do you want to work together to create a better world for everyone?
I’d like to see us learn to create an environment where we can have different beliefs and different perspectives yet have a fundamental core of commitment to love and connection that is where we move into human awakening and creating heaven on earth and integrating the collective shadow.
Thank you for being here, it’s a pleasure to walk the soul purpose path with you.
You’re listening to the soul purpose podcast, the lightning path of embodied spiritual awakening with shadow and light integration. Quit people-pleasing reclaim power and create your soul purpose legacy.
You can access the Free Soul Success Journal & meditation and all episodes of the podcast and all the goodies mentioned in this episode at soulpurposepractice.com
I believe in you and the magic power of your soul.
For more revolutionary teachings and tools please follow on your favorite podcast app or visit soulpurposepodcast.com. I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode.
I am sending you so much love!
